35The Qualities of  Love—part 2 (13:6-7)

[Love] does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. (13:6-7)

LOVE DOES NOT REJOICE IN UNRIGHTEOUSNESS

Love never takes satisfaction from sin, whether our own sin or that of others. Doing wrong things is bad enough in itself; bragging about them makes the sins even worse. To rejoice in unrighteousness is to justify it. It is making wrong appear to be right. “Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil,” Isaiah warns, “who substitute darkness for light and light for darkness” (Isa. 5:20). That is turning God’s truth upside down.

Among the most popular magazines, books, and TV programs are those that glorify sin, that literally rejoice in unrighteousness. More and more explicitly they declare that anything goes and that every person sets his own standards of right and wrong. What is right is doing what you want. Even much news amounts to rejoicing in unrighteousness, because violence, crime, immorality, slander, and the like are attractive to the natural mind and heart. Christians are not immune from enjoying such things, either because we find them entertaining or because we feel self-righteous about not doing them ourselves.

Sometimes rejoicing in unrighteousness takes the form of hoping someone will make a mistake or fall into sin. I have known Christians who wanted to be rid of their marriage partners or were already divorced. But because they did not believe in remarriage unless the other party was unfaithful, they actually hoped their spouses would commit adultery so that they themselves could be scripturally free to remarry!

Rejoicing in sin is wrong first of all because sin is an affront to God. We cannot imagine taking delight in a tragedy that befalls a friend or loved one; yet when we delight in sin, we are delighting in that which offends and grieves our heavenly Father and which is tragedy to Him. If we love God, what offends Him will offend us and what grieves Him will grieve us. “The reproaches of those who reproach Thee have fallen on me,” David said (Ps. 69:9). When God was dishonored David was grieved, because the One whom he loved above all others was maligned. When we enjoy sin, either directly or vicariously in seeing others sin, we prove our lack of love for God.

One of the most common forms of rejoicing in sin is gossip. Gossips would do little harm if they did not have so many eager listeners. This sin, which many Christians treat lightly, is wicked not only because it uncaringly reveals the weaknesses and sins of others, and therefore hurts rather than helps them, but because the heart of gossip is rejoicing in evil. Gossip that is true is still gossip. It is the way unfavorable truth is passed on, and often simply the fact that it is passed on, that makes gossip gossip. It has been defined as vice enjoyed vicariously. The essence of gossip is gloating over the shortcomings and sins of others, which makes gossip a great sin itself. A person is never helped by spreading the news of his sin. Granville Walker said,

Second, rejoicing in sin is wrong because of the consequences it has on the one who sins. Sin can produce nothing but harm. In the unsaved person sin is evidence of his lostness. In a believer sin is evidence of disobedience and broken fellowship with God. To love a person is to hate his sin. Discipline in the church is necessary not only to protect the purity of the body but to help the sinning believer confront his wrong and to repent (cf. Matt. 18:15-20). Paul had reminded the Corinthians of his command “not to associate with any so-called brother if he should be an immoral person, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or a swindler—not even to eat with such a one” (1 Cor. 5:11). In his second letter to Thessalonica he said, “Now we command you, brethren, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you keep aloof from every brother who leads an unruly life and not according to the tradition which you received from us” (2 Thess. 3:6). That the apostle considered this principle entirely consistent with love, in fact a necessary part of love, is seen in the previous verse: “And may the Lord direct your hearts into the love of God and into the steadfastness of Christ” (v 5). Love cannot tolerate evil or rejoice in it in any way.

LOVE REJOICES WITH THE TRUTH

After mentioning eight negatives, things that love is not or does not do, Paul lists five more positives (see v. 4a). The first is a contrast with the last negative: love rejoices with the truth.

At first glance it may seem strange to contrast not rejoicing in unrighteousness with rejoicing in the truth. But the truth Paul is speaking about here is not simply factual truth. He is speaking of God’s truth, God’s revealed Word. Righteousness is predicated on God’s truth and cannot exist apart from it. Love always rejoices in God’s truth and never with falsehood or false teaching. Love cannot tolerate wrong doctrine. It makes no sense to say, “It doesn’t make a great difference if people don’t agree with us about doctrine. What matters is that we love them.” That is the basic view of what is commonly called the ecumenical movement. But if we love others it will matter a great deal to us whether or not what they believe is right or wrong. What they believe affects their souls, their eternal destinies, and their representation of God’s will, and therefore should be of the highest concern to us. It also affects the souls and destinies of those whom they influence.

Love is consistent with kindness but it is not consistent with compromise of the truth. Compromising the truth is not kind to those whom we mislead by our failure to stand firmly in the truth. “This is love,” John tells us, “that we walk according to His commandments” (2 John 6). To compromise, for example, with those who cast doubt on the incarnation is not loving, and it risks losing reward (w 7-8). Love, truth, and righteousness are inseparable. When one is weakened the others are weakened. A person who teaches falsehood about God’s truth should not even be received into our home or given a greeting (v. 10). We are not to rejoice in a wrong doctrine that he teaches or in a wrong way in which he lives. Love rejoices in the truth and never in falsehood or unrighteousness.

On the other hand, love does not focus on the wrongs of others. It does not parade their faults for all the world to see. Love does not disregard falsehood and unrighteousness, but as much as possible it focuses on the true and the right. It looks for the good, hopes for the good, and emphasizes the good. It rejoices in those who teach the truth and live the truth.

A Scottish minister was known for his love and encouragement of the people of his church and village. When he died someone commented, “There is no one left to appreciate the triumphs of ordinary folk.” Love appreciates the triumphs of ordinary folk. Our children are built up and strengthened when we encourage them in their accomplishments and in their obedience. Love does not rejoice in falsehood or wrong, but its primary business is to build up, not tear down, to strengthen, not weaken.

William Gladstone, a prime minister of England in the nineteenth century, one night was working late on an important speech he was to give to the House of Commons the next day. At about two o’clock in the morning a woman knocked on his door, asking the servant if Mr. Gladstone would come and comfort her young crippled son who lay dying in a tenement not far away. Without hesitation the busy man set his speech aside and went. He spent the rest of the night with the boy, comforting him and leading him to accept Jesus Christ as Savior. The boy died about dawn, and Gladstone returned home. He told a friend later that morning, “I am the happiest man in the world today.” The true greatness of Gladstone was not in his political position or attainments but in his great love, a love that would risk his political future to show the love of Christ to a young boy in great need. As it turned out, that morning he also made what some historians claim was the greatest speech of his life. He gained that victory, too, but he had been willing to lose it for the sake of a greater one. Love’s victory was more important.

LOVE BEARS ALL THINGS

The four qualities mentioned in verse 7 are hyperbole, exaggerations to make a point. Paul has made it clear that love rejects jealousy, bragging, arrogance, unseemliness, selfishness, anger, resentment, and unrighteousness. It does not bear, believe, hope, or endure lies, false teaching, or anything else that is not of God. By all things Paul is speaking of all things acceptable in God’s righteousness and will, of everything within the Lord’s divine tolerance. The four qualities listed here are closely related and are given in ascending order.

Stegō (to bear) basically means to cover or to support and therefore to protect. Love bears all things by protecting others from exposure, ridicule, or harm. Genuine love does not gossip or listen to gossip. Even when a sin is certain, love tries to correct it with the least possible hurt and harm to the guilty person. Love never protects sin but is anxious to protect the sinner.

Fallen human nature has the opposite inclination. There is perverse pleasure in exposing someone’s faults and failures. As already mentioned, that is what makes gossip appealing. The Corinthians cared little for the feelings or welfare of fellow believers. It was every person for himself. Like the Pharisees, they paid little attention to others, except when those others were failing or sinning. Man’s depravity causes him to rejoice in the depravity of others. It is that depraved pleasure that sells magazines and newspapers that cater to exposes, “true confessions,” and the like. It is the same sort of pleasure that makes children tattle on brothers and sisters. Whether to feel self-righteous by exposing another’s sin or to enjoy that sin vicariously, we all are tempted to take a certain kind of pleasure in the sins of others. Love has no part in that. It does not expose or exploit, gloat or condemn. It bears; it does not bare.

“Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all transgressions” (Prov 10:12). We can measure our love for a person by how quick we are to cover his faults. When one of our children does something wrong we are inclined to put the best face on it. “He didn’t understand what he was doing,” we explain, or “She didn’t really mean what she said.” With a person we do not like, however, our reaction is likely to be the opposite: “That is typical of John,” or, “What would you expect from someone like her?”

Love does not justify sin or compromise with falsehood. Love warns, corrects, exhorts, rebukes, and disciplines. But love does not expose or broadcast failures and wrongs. It covers and protects. Henry Ward Beecher said, “God pardons like a mother who kisses the offense into everlasting forgetfulness.”

The mercy seat, where the blood of atonement was sprinkled (Lev 16:14), was a covering, not only for the ark itself but for the sins of the people. The mercy seat was a place of covering. That covering prefigured the perfect and final covering of sin accomplished by Jesus on the cross in His great propitiatory sacrifice (Rom. 3:25-26; Heb. 2:17; 1 John 2:2). In the cross God threw the great mantle of His love over sin, forever covering it for those who trust in His Son. By nature, love is redemptive. It wants to buy back, not condemn, to save, not judge.

Love feels the pain of those it loves and helps carry the burden of the hurt. True love is even willing to take the consequences of the sin of those it loves. Isaiah wrote of Jesus Christ, “Surely our griefs He Himself bore, and our sorrows He carried; … He was pierced through for our transgressions, He was crushed for our iniquities; the chastening for our well-being fell upon Him” (Isa. 53:4-5). As Peter knew firsthand from Jesus’ great patience and kindness, “love covers a multitude of sins” (1 Pet. 4:8).

During Oliver Cromwell’s reign as lord protector of England a young soldier was sentenced to die. The girl to whom he was engaged pleaded with Cromwell to spare the life of her beloved, but to no avail. The young man was to be executed when the curfew bell sounded, but when the sexton repeatedly pulled the rope the bell made no sound. The girl had climbed into the belfry and wrapped herself around the clapper so that it could not strike the bell. Her body was smashed and bruised, but she did not let go until the clapper stopped swinging. She managed to climb down, bruised and bleeding, to meet those awaiting the execution. When she explained what she had done, Cromwell commuted the sentence. A poet beautifully recorded the story as follows:

LOVE BELIEVES ALL THINGS

In addition to bearing all things, love also believes all things. Love is not suspicious or cynical. When it throws its mantle over a wrong it also believes in the best outcome for the one who has done the wrong—that the wrong will be confessed and forgiven and the loved one restored to righteousness.

Love also believes all things in another way. If there is doubt about a person’s guilt or motivation, love will always opt for the most favorable possibility. If a loved one is accused of something wrong, love will consider him innocent until proven guilty. If he turns out to be guilty, love will give credit for the best motive. Love trusts; love has confidence; love believes.

In our church we continually try to develop a spirit of mutual trust, within the staff and within the congregation as a whole. We believe that each person is dedicated to the Lord and is responsible for serving Him. We believe each person is living in fellowship with the Lord. When someone fails, as we all do, then our desire is to help cover that wrong and help it be made right. Whenever there is doubt, we would rather err on the favorable side.

Job’s friends showed few signs of love. They were ready to believe the worst about him, being thoroughly convinced that his problems could only have been caused by his sins. Job did not himself understand why he was suffering so terribly, but he knew it was not because of his sins. “Behold, I know your thoughts,” he responded to his friends, “and the plans by which you would wrong me” (Job 21:27). They gave Job no benefit of doubt because they had no true love for him. Knowing the uprightness of Job’s life, loving friends would have realized that his sufferings were out of proportion to whatever shortcomings he had.

The lovelessness of the scribes and Pharisees is seen in their predisposition to see the worst in others, including Jesus. When Jesus forgave the paralytic of his sins, the Pharisees immediately concluded He was blaspheming (Luke 5:21). To further evidence His divine power Jesus then healed the man of his affliction. Most of the crowd marveled at the miracle and glorified God (v 26), but we know from their later words and actions that the scribes and Pharisees remained convinced that Jesus was evil. Hatred believes the worst; love believes the best.

Love is a harbor of trust. When that trust is broken, love’s first reaction is to heal and restore. “Brethren, even if a man is caught in any trespass, you who are spiritual, restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness; each one looking to yourself, lest you too be tempted” (Gal.6:1).

LOVE HOPES ALL THINGS

Even when belief in a loved one’s goodness or repentance is shattered, love still hopes. When it runs out of faith it holds on to hope. As long as God’s grace is operative human failure is never final. God would not take Israel’s failure as final. Jesus would not take Peter’s failure as final. Paul would not take the Corinthians’ failure as final. There are more than enough promises in the Bible to make love hopeful.

The parents of backslidden children, the spouse of an unbelieving marriage partner, the church that has disciplined members who do not repent—all hope in love that the child, the spouse, or the erring brother or sister will be saved or restored. Love refuses to take failure as final. The rope of love’s hope has no end. As long as there is life, love does not lose hope. When our hope becomes weak, we know our love has become weak.

I heard the story of a dog who stayed at the airport of a large city for over five years waiting for his master to return. Employees and others fed the dog and took care of him, but he would not leave the spot where he last saw his master. He would not give up hope that someday they would be reunited. If a dog’s love for his master can produce that kind of hope, how much longer should our love make hope last?

LOVE ENDURES ALL THINGS

Hupomenō (“to endure”) was a military term used of an army’s holding a vital position at all costs. Every hardship and every suffering was to be endured in order to hold fast.

Love holds fast to those it loves. It endures all things at all costs. It stands against overwhelming opposition and refuses to stop bearing or stop believing or stop hoping. Love will not stop loving.

Stephen lovingly bore the ridicule and rejection of those to whom he witnessed. Their taunts would not make him stop believing they would believe, and their stones would not make him stop hoping they would be saved. He died praying, “Lord, do not hold this sin against them!” (Acts 7:60). Like his Lord, he loved to the end even the unloving enemies who put him to death. His love endured.

Love bears what otherwise is unbearable; it believes what otherwise is unbelievable; it hopes in what otherwise is hopeless; and it endures when anything less than love would give up. After love bears it believes. After it believes it hopes. After it hopes it endures. There is no “after” for endurance, for endurance is the unending climax of love.